I am constantly shocked by the changes in my city and state. The change has been tremendous from the time back when my family got excited that Meijer grocery was selling chili peppers to today when I saw it. I stopped at a gas station on my way to work this morning, a gas station near the OSU campus. I say this because most Mexicanos in Columbus live on the West side of the city. So, there I was at a gas station in central Columbus and right by the cashier (not buried away in an “ethnic section”) was my favorite junk food, Sabritones! According to their website “a puffed wheat snack from Mexico that combines the authentic flavors of spicy chili with tangy lime”. At first I could never get Sabritones in Columbus. Then I could only get them at the Mexican grocery store. And now? Now they are at my gas station next to the mints. I am amazed. You Xicanos in Cali, and Chicago and in the Valley just don’t get it; This is amazing!
August, 2007
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Sabritones make my heart skip a beat
August 31, 2007 by elenamary
Category Latinos, Ohio, personal | Tags: food,Mexican Culture | 8 Comments
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Goodbye Alberto
August 27, 2007 by elenamary
You make me feel ashamed of being an American, A Mexican-American, the daughter of an immigrant, of being a human like you.
Sadly, I didn’t realize until 2003, after reading the Texas Clemency Memos article in Atlantic Montly, just how bad you could be.
You have had no regard for basic human rights let alone civil rights. May you repent for all the harm of you have done and all the ill that will continue because of you.
Goodbye and good riddance, Alberto Gonzales.
Category personal, Politics | Tags: | 4 Comments
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repent and regret
August 24, 2007 by elenamary
i regret my previous post. i at first was going to take it down. but i guess the point of a personal blog (for me) is to watch how i evolve…and damn i hope i evolve from that previous post. i regret it deeply, and apologize. it was cruel and shallow.
love to the world,
elenamary
Category personal | Tags: | 1 Comment
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Schadenfreude
August 23, 2007 by elenamary
I am enjoying a smidgen of Schadenfreude and while I do feel a bit guilty the pleasure outweighs the guilt.
I used to get malicious messages posted to different online accounts I had. Usually the insults were about my physical appearance. I was never able to imagine who had so much anger towards me. Recently, it was all clarified. I was having an enjoyable conversation with an ex-boyfriend, when for some reason I mentioned the online attacks. He then explained they were from his ex-wife. I didn’t understand, was he sure they were from his ex-wife? But they were sent while the two of them were happily married, why would she do that? Was she jealous of me? Why?
She was jealous. For some reason, I guess she thought, he still felt something for me and it bothered her. Despite the fact that he and I hadn’t spoken in years. But now, that I know it was her, I am feeling some Schadenfreude. Her marriage to him failed. And although we never spoke during their courtship, marriage or divorce, it is I who still talks to him. I have a wonderful friendship with him, better than we had when we were dating. Despite her craziness and venomous ways, I am the one who talks to the man she loves…
Aren’t I an awful person?
Category personal, sexuality | Tags: | No Comments
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¡Yo! by Julia Alvarez
August 22, 2007 by elenamary
Today I finished ¡Yo! by Julia Alvarez. I was first introduced to her by my Latino Studies professor Dr. Ellen Gil-Gomez. She was one of those professors who will never really know how much of an influence she had on me. Back to ¡Yo!. When I first began to read it, the story reminded me of my sister. The book begins with a sister criticizing her sister, author, Yolanda. The family is upset with Yolanda for publishing the families personal stories.
My sister wrote about my parents relationship and how it influenced her life as a girl and then woman of “mixed” ethnicity. I was the one that proudly called my father and told him to head to a local bookstore and read the book. He called me a few hours after he read it. His voice was steady when he called, it was an angry steady. I could picture his face a deep red, the veins in his nick throbbing, and a bit of foam forming in between the corners of his lips. He asked me in deep monotone if I had sent him to read it order to hurt him. I thought for just a moment, and pictured him gritting his teeth, and honestly it did please me to think I had hurt him but instead I lied “No, I didn’t want to hurt you” which flowed almost as smoothly as the truth that followed “I am proud of Cristina. The truth is she thanks you for her feminism. She thanks you for encouraging us to learn and question”.
Thus, at first while reading, ¡Yo!, I thought of my sister, and she reminded me so much of the author. My sister tall(er) and slender, Latina, never happy in one place, able to express the vitality of her soul to anyone in a short story, while I could write for the rest of my life, and never write anything close to as beautiful. However, as ¡Yo! continued I began to think of myself.
I often think and sate that I don’t censor myself on my blog. I asked my mother to read my blog and she has refused, saying I should have some privacy and that she doesn’t want to influence what or how I write. I told my mom, that her reading my blog wouldn’t change my blogging. I asked a man I am smitten with to read my blog and he has. I now regret asking him too. I find I am censoring myself, now that I know he is reading. I mean he could’ve been reading it before. My blog is easy enough to find since it is is linked on my myspace, and googable by real name. Do guys google ladies before their first date? I know I do it. Fuck, I don’t just Google them I do background checks…for real.
Anyway back to censoring, I realize I do censor despite my arguing for years that I don’t. Not only do I censor I refuse to admit the truth to myself. I don’t blog about my fear of STD’s, about my fear of never having children, about my fear of not being smart enough for standardized tests, my fear of failing chemistry, my fear of failing at life. I don’t write about them because one I hate admitting them out loud and two I don’t want some people to know my weaknesses and insecurities; despite the fact we all have weaknesses and insecurities.
All you bloggers, all you writers, all you family members of bloggers and writers, go read ¡Yo! by Julia Alvarez, and ask yourself, could you step back and be as honest as she is about the writer in your life or yourself?
C/S
Category Latinos, personal | Tags: books | 4 Comments
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Latinos in Ohio
August 19, 2007 by elenamary
Year-round Schools Don’t Boost Learning, Study Finds
Science Daily (press release) – USAA sociologist at Ohio State University found that, over a full year, math and reading test scores improved about the same amount for children in year-round schools as they did for students whose schools followed a traditional nine-month calendar.
Children attending year-round schools were mostly Hispanic and tended to be somewhat poorer than average, but their poverty was moderate rather than severe. Year-round schools also tended to have problems with overcrowding.
Hispanic numbers grow in southeast Ohio
Zanesville Times Recorder – Zanesville,OH,USAWhile their overall numbers remain small — less than 1 percent of the total population– there has been an explosion of growth in the number of Hispanics in southeastern Ohio. The Hispanic population in Muskingum County has grown 15.4 percent since the 2000 Census. The increase in Perry County is 27.6 percent.
(My brother was born in Muskingum County in 1983, my sister was born in Perry County in 1982.
My mom ran into the doctor who delivered my sister and he remembered my mother because he hadn’t ever had a latino patient before or heard of a latina patient given birth in the area. He said he went 10 years after my sister’s birth before he had another Latina patient)
Fulton County clinic assists working poor
Toledo Blade – Toledo,OH,USAA couple of more free clinics are being considered for Defiance, including one aimed at the Hispanic population, and the trend is likely to continue…
Racial makeup changes in Ohio
Akron Beacon Journal – Akron,OH,USAThe non-Hispanic white population was down in 43 counties a statewide decrease of 47,256 since 2000.
Across Ohio, the number of Hispanic residents grew by 50,627 up 23 percent since 2000.
Rural Wayne County saw the fastest Hispanic growth in the area a 40 percent increase since 2000.Ummmm anyone wanna tell the Akron Beacon Journal that “hispanic” is an ethnicity not a race?
I am going to have me some babies, and they are going to be White-Blatinos…go ahead and figure that one out.
Also, I wonder what is going on Wayne county if it is really a change or if things are just now being documented. I worked as a union organizer for farm labor in Wayne County and during the summers it was quite easy to come across migrant camps with a few hundered workers, and those were just the ones that were unionized…
County population declines 3 percent
Cincinnati Post – OH,USAHamilton County’s total population dropped 3 percent in the past six years while its Hispanic community climbed 40 percent, according to US Census Bureau …
What POC would want to live in Cincinnati?
Banking on a change
Columbus Dispatch – Columbus,OH,USABanks are busy translating brochures into Spanish and working with community groups to draw members of central Ohio’s fast-growing Latino population into the financial mainstream.
Hire me, I’ll show you how to recruit and get people to stick with it. For example, if you explain to them the importance/requirements of having a debit/credit card to get cars back across the border when returning to Mexico, then they will be interested, you’ve got to convince people why they need it, and trust me they do—they just don’t know it.
Category Latinos, Ohio, Politics | Tags: | 1 Comment